All you need is this (we had a bunch left over from Christmas, it was supposed to be turned into whip cream and ice cream, but that didn't happen for whatever reason)
And one of these, and a dash of salt. Really, that's it.
Add the heavy whipping cream and the dash of salt to the food processor, and turn it on. (Really, that is the hardest part)
About a minute later, it will look like this. But don't stop yet. You're almost there, I promise.
After about another minute it will look like this. It has gotten very thick, and has started to crumble. Mine stopped rotating in the food processor and just kind turned over and and over rather than going around and around.
At this point you realize that you have made butter in about three minutes, and feel super accomplished. Find a comfy chair and get back to your reading. And when anyone asks what you did this afternoon, tell them the truth, you made butter. They'll all be very impressed at your hard work and homey skills. No one ever needs to know how easy it was, do they?